Thursday, 31 October 2019

Update

The last month or so I've really been struggling with my mental health again. It's hard that I'm not really a talker. I let things build up to a point where I can no longer cope with it. It's a bad habit, I've got so used to covering my feelings so well so when I do finally explode it looks like it's come from nowhere. I'm hoping once I finally start my therapy I can learn a new way of dealing with these issues.

At the moment I'm trying to fully focus on getting things ready for Christmas. I know it's only October (until tomorrow anyway) but once Kaspers birthday has come and gone I have to start getting presents. 4 children, 2 of which have birthdays on 29th Dec and 4th Jan and a 3rd on 30th January so it's an expensive month to leave it all until the month before.
I have a few more bits to get for the kids and I'm done and then it's just family to sort out.
I get so excited to see their little faces every year. I love knowing I've done a good job (with some help from the husband when he's not cursing me for dragging him shopping).
Once christmas and birthdays are out of the way I can relax a little before saving for our holiday in August.

This morning I've been woken up at 5am from an excited Kasper who has been waiting for Halloween for so long. Tonight will consist of trick or treating with the kids and then we are going to cuddle up on the sofa with a hot chocolate and watch Hocus Pocus.  I love the autumn, especially Halloween.

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Our Angel Mila

It seems pretty unfair that once again im back in this dark place.  It's like my mind is in a prison that I can't break it out from....